How Long is Too Long to Breastfeed?

Dear Diary,

Most of the time when you see me, you see my children close behind. They even went to the White House with me! It was an amazing experience. I was briefed by President Obama himself and my breastfeeding baby was by my side. Usually, I want my children to tag along places, especially because of my husband’s work schedule. But this time, my 18-month-old went along for the trip because I’m still a nursing mommy.  Yes, I’m one of the 9.4 percent of American moms who still breastfeed at 18 months according to the Centers for Disease Control.

I knew I would always breastfeed my children. I just never thought we would do it for so long.

I’ve found people to be incredibly supportive of my choice to breastfeed an infant, but those same people aren’t so understanding when they find out my baby is now a toddler.

The funniest reaction occurred at a conference. I shared with someone I just met that I brought my child (who was 16 months at the time) along, because I was still nursing. At first, she told me that was great. When she found out my baby’s age, she said, Wait, he’s how old? Okay, no judgment, no judgment. You really had to see her braids swing around with the double take, because it caused the people at the table to bust out laughing.

My family’s reaction was expressed to me when my sister asked how long I planned to breastfeed my son. She used this super serious tone and knowing my family, I know that this was a background discussion she’d been nominated to have with me. I replied something vague, and she then launched into a spiel.

I know that in other cultures this is accepted but we live in America and our culture says you need to stop. He can walk and talk. It’s just been too long.

I just laughed it off and told her that when she became my primary caregiver, I’d take her thoughts into account. He was 18 months at the time.

I need to be honest though. While I loved being able to meet my baby’s nutritional, I do have a 20- month-old toddler, and I’m ready to wrap it up. I want to wear dresses as opposed to two-piece outfits for easy access. I also don’t want to be pulled on in public with him saying nurse. I’ve tried to end the relationship a few times, but I haven’t reached the breaking point.

Soon we must end our nursing relationship, and I’m not sure how I’ll feel about it. I know that I’ll be very happy that I can go someplace overnight without the baby! While I might be melancholy that I no longer have a baby, I also think I’ll be incredibly proud that I have a little boy who’s growing up.

Hey DFTM Fam—I am open to any tips on how to break free an extender nurser. Please share any in the comments! 

Kendra is a wife, mommy to two active little boys, and stepmother to a college junior. She nursed her first son for 21 months and is still going with the second one at 20 months in. She also wears the headbands of business owner, community volunteer and philanthropist.  She spends her time with organizations that support women and children, loves to make connections and learn new things. She has a background in strategic research/ communications and event management.  You can check out Kendra’s blog at She blogs at Headbands for Today.  You can also find her on Twitter and Facebook.